Living In Wonderland

I've taking a liking to blogging lately. It gives me a place where I can vent or get things out in the open that I just feel like sharing to the world. This blog inparticular will be my personal, daily life blog about what its like to go from being a normal young adult, to one that has seizures.




I chose the title of my blog because me having seizures, is alot like Alice falling down the rabbit hole into Wonderland. In fact, the author of Alice in Wonderland had Temporal Lobe Epilepsy (TLE) and used his seizure experiences as parts of the story. Many people think this is all drugs (eating the mushroom and the caterpillar smoking a hooka) but infact it was just ways that he could show people what a seizure looks or feels like. Sometimes you feel larger than everything around you, sometimes smaller. Uncontrollable crying fits, hallucinations, feelings of time skips or even feelings of fear. There are feelings of falling, or sudden dizzyness, as well as tunnel vision, having things feel familiar when they arent (deja vu) or having them feel unfamiliar when they are (jamais vu)




I have experienced all of the above and more. But its hard to talk about these things face to face because of the stigma attached to Epilepsy. Even within the health care community there is stigma that seizures are only caused by stress if you havent had them since childhood. That your crazy and its all in your head. And sadly the diagnosing tools that are used are unreliable, often giving false positives or false negatives. Even neurologists arent completely up to date and are utterly lacking any compassion as to what its like to sudden fall down that rabbit hole and have your life turned upside down.




This blog will be my diary of how things are going. My next post will be starting from square one so you can read the whole story. I am trying to put the peices together so that I can figure out where and why the seizures started. Hopefully it will give me a better insight to make them stop, and will stop my neurologist from blowing me off like I am nuts. I will also post statistics and facts and videos every now and then. Just so that those who read this and follow along are as educated about seizures as possible.




Take care everyone! By the end of this blogging experience I hope to have found my way out of Wonderland. :)